Sahail AshrafWHY OH WHY WON’T SHE SLEEP???
March 5th 2007 09:33
I’ve had it! I’m going insane. Someone chuck me in an institution and dope me up on drugs before I really lose the plot. I love my daughter, I really, really love her. But why, oh why, won’t she sleep????
I’ve tried everything from the moment she entered this world, but it’s just suddenly getting to me (not that it didn’t ever before), but I just feel so weighed down by it all. Princess Toddler is all of 22 months of age and already deciding she can do without her daily nap. Are you kidding me? After going through nearly two hours of trying to get her to have her much-needed nap each day (if only someone would inform her of this), I am completely exhausted. Then, of course, I end up with a very irritable girl on my hands for the remainder of the day, which makes me even more exhausted. Then, trying to get an overtired toddler to bed at the end of the day is more fun and games.
Admittedly, this is not happening every single day, but every second day is enough to leave me feeling frustrated, tired, fed up etc etc. It’s great that she doesn’t scream anymore the whole time, she often just talks or calls out to me, but I just can’t bear it. She totally loses it when it comes time to put her to bed. Anyone would think I was stringing her up by her toenails in a dark cupboard while burning her teddies in front of it. And yes, it’s that dramatic.
I wish I were stronger. I wish I could just leave her to sort herself out. I wish it didn’t matter so much to me how she’s feeling at every second of the day. I can’t stand to see her upset. I know she knows this, no one need tell me that she’s got me wrapped around her little finger and all such popular expression for ‘hey, you’re being manipulated here.’ But I just can’t alter the way I feel. I was doing well with it for such a long time but …
End of rant. I need a Bacardi and coke – or maybe just the Bacardi without the coke!
I’ve tried everything from the moment she entered this world, but it’s just suddenly getting to me (not that it didn’t ever before), but I just feel so weighed down by it all. Princess Toddler is all of 22 months of age and already deciding she can do without her daily nap. Are you kidding me? After going through nearly two hours of trying to get her to have her much-needed nap each day (if only someone would inform her of this), I am completely exhausted. Then, of course, I end up with a very irritable girl on my hands for the remainder of the day, which makes me even more exhausted. Then, trying to get an overtired toddler to bed at the end of the day is more fun and games.
Admittedly, this is not happening every single day, but every second day is enough to leave me feeling frustrated, tired, fed up etc etc. It’s great that she doesn’t scream anymore the whole time, she often just talks or calls out to me, but I just can’t bear it. She totally loses it when it comes time to put her to bed. Anyone would think I was stringing her up by her toenails in a dark cupboard while burning her teddies in front of it. And yes, it’s that dramatic.
I wish I were stronger. I wish I could just leave her to sort herself out. I wish it didn’t matter so much to me how she’s feeling at every second of the day. I can’t stand to see her upset. I know she knows this, no one need tell me that she’s got me wrapped around her little finger and all such popular expression for ‘hey, you’re being manipulated here.’ But I just can’t alter the way I feel. I was doing well with it for such a long time but …
End of rant. I need a Bacardi and coke – or maybe just the Bacardi without the coke!
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Comment by Tracy
Movies and Life
I don't have children but I feel your frustration, wish I could help....but hopefully other bloggers might be able to,
Tracy
Comment by Candice
Thanks for dropping by, and thanks for your words of encouragement. It helped a little just to vent. I'm searching for that magical potion to get her to sleep easily and soundly!
Comment by Lily
Ars Poetica
I just went back 12 years, and truly I was so sleep deprived, i can't remember what I did, but i do remember the chamomile being very calming for her. It worked for the first baby, not the second though. 50/50?
Also, the sleep dramas do eventually end.
All the best Candice,
~Lily
Comment by katyzzz
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This is really tough.
Encourage her to rest, say you don't have to sleep, just stay in bed and read books etc or else both lie down together, experiment, ask her why she doesn't want to sleep.
If all fails, feed her early of an evening and put her to bed earlier.
There's nothing worse than a sleep deprived child and her desperate mum.
Tried swapping with a neighbour every second day, she mind yours one day, you mind hers the next.
There is just so much variation in child care that you can try.
I always said I would never put honey on a dummy, with my third I just put the tiniest amount plus there were about three dummies under her pillow so if she lost one, she'd find another, she had all her teeth by 14 months including 2yr old.
Hope you think of something.
katyzzz......love and stuff and take it easy.
Comment by Candice
That's a fantastic idea, I'll definitely give it a try. I have chamomile tea myself when I can't sleep - it works really well for me so fingers crossed ...
I'm very glad to hear there's light at the end of the tunnel ... ATM it seems this will last forever.
Thanks for dropping by and for the wonderful advice.
Comment by Candice
Thanks for the ideas - you always come up with things I hadn't thought of, that most of the time work well.
It's funny you mention the child care idea - just last week my sister and I started swapping one afternoon each with our littlies because she's going back to uni and I'd like more time to write. So, yes, that does help relieve some of this by having a break from it.
My daughter is super slow with getting her four back molars. There's still no sign of them and she's been teething off and on for at least six months (seems that long if it's not anyway). Teething - it's really a parent's worst nightmare! The human body is not always so well designed.
Thanks for passing on some of Mrs M's love & stuff - I need it right now!
Comment by Mrs M
Mum's Word
I hear ya honey. You are absolutely right about the effect it can have on you. It really does feel like a psychological torture test sometimes.
My second did the same - tried to give up the day sleep, so I would try to alternate days - sleep every second day. I think it lasted for a couple of weeks until he realised he needed to sleep during the day.
I even went to the trouble of finding a lavender scented bear to 'relax' him.
Lily's chamomile idea sounds fantastic.
But every kid is different, which is what makes it frustrating.
Lots of love and stuff
Mrs M
Comment by Anonymous
I hope your daughter manages to let you get some rest.
Take Care.
Sarah.
Comment by Sarah White
coolgirlsar to the rescue
One Too Many Chocolate Bars
Comment by Kleonaptra
Kalikapsychosis
darling, I can feel your pain and frustration. Not having kids I cant empathize, but I do sympathize.
I know this isnt the 'done' thing in this day and age, but if all else fails, do as my grandad did with his five kids and over ten grand kids. A nice warm milk. With a drop of brandy. Works everytime, Im told. Particularly if you and bubba are getting stressed, its worth it.
Comment by Lilla
Enviro Warrior
An Extra Ordinary Life
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Have you tried putting her down next to the washing machine when it's on?
How about putting a clicking clock under her pillow ... often babies need to hear the beartbeat of mum ... from womb days...?
Failing this, rub some brandy on her gums... for the teething blues... she has lots of them coming through now... Bonjella is another alternative for the gums... and you drink the brandy .. *lol* but seriously it can really help calm them down...
Failing that, don't underestimate the tyrant inside a two year old. Be firm, let her cry for 20 minutes before entering the room.. they usually give up by 19.5 minutes...
good luck,
my heartfelt sympathy...
keep trying things..
Lilla ...
Comment by Candice
Yes, psychological test is right, I feel like I'm at the point where I can't bear leaving her crying and screaming after me anymore. I have made her afternoon nap really late the last couple of days, so she's at least having a bit of kip - let's hope that bit lasts okay!
Hi Sarah,
I had a look at the blog - go the bribery hey?! I'm not looking forward to when my daughter's in her own bed and can get out herself - I think I will have much the same issues as you. At least I have managed to get her sleeping through the night okay for quite a while now - sleep deprivation is a killer!
Hi Kleo (can I abbreviate, I always spell it wrong and have to go back and fix!?),
Yep, I think I need a big shot of brandy - oops that's for her not me LOL. Thanks for your comment and advice.
Hi Lilla,
Yes, a few things there I could go back to trying but haven't done in a while - Bonjela and the old white noise trick ( I didn't know it would still work after baby age so I'll give that a try because it used to be a good one - I'd set the radio 'off channel'). I also need to be firm with my 20 minute visits - I wasn't going in because she was just talking but when I do go in I find I have more chance of getting her to sleep. Thanks muchly for the ideas ... and brandy? Yes, I think I need it most LOL.