Sahail AshrafFive Things you can do with Vita-brits – Besides Eating Them
March 15th 2007 23:55
Princess Toddler has not eaten Vita-brits for several months. Being as toddlers are, she used to love them, then she suddenly refused to let the cereal anywhere near her lips. But after showing an interest in my cornflakes I gave them another go last week, and lo and behold they’re back on the toddler menu.
I was cheering that I could get Princess Toddler to devour them once more, especially as I struggle to get milk into her (she totally refuses to drink it from a cup). The only issue is that I had forgotten how sticky and messy the damn things are. Nothing gets all over a toddler, chairs, tables, floors, doors, windows, parents, like Vita-brits. And if I don’t manage to wipe the sticky mess away quickly it solidifies like cement, seemingly never to be removed again.
There were many occasions when Princess Toddler was a baby and I thought I’d successfully removed all traces of the cereal. Only to find one we went out in the daylight that there were many remnants stuck to her face, hands, arms – and sometimes legs and tummy. One woman even said to me once that her skin looked dry. I embarrassedly replied that no, her skin is great, they are Vita-brits stuck to her eyelids.
So I have come up with some better, and more successful, uses for Vita-brits. Here they are:
1. Building a house? Vita-brits make excellent mortar between bricks. Just scrape onto a brick with a trowel, place another brick on top and allow to set.
2. Does your hat from keep blowing off in the wind? Stick a spoonful of Vita-brits on top of your head and press your hat on (NB. You will need some good quality shampoo to get the Vita-brits out of your hair afterwards).
3. Broken toys lying around, yet to be fixed? Vita-brits will stick anything together – dolls, trucks, books. It’s much stronger and more durable than super glue or araldite.
4. Sick of getting junk mail, despite your ‘no junk mail’ sticker that’s clearly visible on your letterbox? Fill your newspaper section of the letterbox with Vita-brits – no one will have the strength to get junk mail through this wall of steel. (NB. Be sure not to let any get into the letter slot or you’ll end up without genuine mail too).
5. Do you have a gossipy neighbour who constantly drops in unannounced? Place a spoonful of Vita-brits in your neighbour’s coffee next time he/she pops by. Your neighbour’s lips will be sealed shut after several mouthfuls.
I was cheering that I could get Princess Toddler to devour them once more, especially as I struggle to get milk into her (she totally refuses to drink it from a cup). The only issue is that I had forgotten how sticky and messy the damn things are. Nothing gets all over a toddler, chairs, tables, floors, doors, windows, parents, like Vita-brits. And if I don’t manage to wipe the sticky mess away quickly it solidifies like cement, seemingly never to be removed again.
There were many occasions when Princess Toddler was a baby and I thought I’d successfully removed all traces of the cereal. Only to find one we went out in the daylight that there were many remnants stuck to her face, hands, arms – and sometimes legs and tummy. One woman even said to me once that her skin looked dry. I embarrassedly replied that no, her skin is great, they are Vita-brits stuck to her eyelids.
So I have come up with some better, and more successful, uses for Vita-brits. Here they are:
1. Building a house? Vita-brits make excellent mortar between bricks. Just scrape onto a brick with a trowel, place another brick on top and allow to set.
2. Does your hat from keep blowing off in the wind? Stick a spoonful of Vita-brits on top of your head and press your hat on (NB. You will need some good quality shampoo to get the Vita-brits out of your hair afterwards).
3. Broken toys lying around, yet to be fixed? Vita-brits will stick anything together – dolls, trucks, books. It’s much stronger and more durable than super glue or araldite.
4. Sick of getting junk mail, despite your ‘no junk mail’ sticker that’s clearly visible on your letterbox? Fill your newspaper section of the letterbox with Vita-brits – no one will have the strength to get junk mail through this wall of steel. (NB. Be sure not to let any get into the letter slot or you’ll end up without genuine mail too).
5. Do you have a gossipy neighbour who constantly drops in unannounced? Place a spoonful of Vita-brits in your neighbour’s coffee next time he/she pops by. Your neighbour’s lips will be sealed shut after several mouthfuls.
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Comment by Hope
Gifted Parenting
Freelance For Life
Comment by Mrs M
Mum's Word
Love & stuff
Mrs M
Comment by Candice
Yes, they're a cereal manufactured in Australia. What a shame you don't have them o/s LOL. Vita-brits are these crunchy wheat biscuits that go mushy when you add the milk - hence the sticky factor!
Comment by Candice
I was having a bad food day at the time but, yes, decided I may as well laugh over it all! Vita-brits were everywhere that day as my daughter rather messily fed herself the cereal - uugh! I think it took me at least 15 minutes to clean up afterwards.