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Parenting Prattle - by Sahail Ashraf

 
Welcome to Parenting Prattle, where all things parenting and children will be explored! If there is something you would like to see covered, or you've got a specific question just let me know!

Age Gaps Between Children

November 8th 2006 03:05
There was an interesting report recently on Mornings with Kerri-Anne about age gaps between children. A psychologist was interviewed on the subject and the statistics on age gaps between children were surprising. The psychologist explained that people are either having children very close together, with less than two years gap, or very far apart, with seven to nine years gap. The psychologist explained the statistics are unusual because the ‘ideal’ gap between children for a woman’s health and the advantages to siblings, is three to four years.

In my own experience I’ve noticed that this does seem to be the case, at least among people I know. Most women at my mum’s group and at playgroup are having the second baby when the first child is either under two or just over two years of age. I also read in ‘What to Expect in the First Year’ by Eisenberg, Murkoff and Hathaway that at least two years between pregnancies is best for a woman’s health, though I can certainly understand the reasons why people would want children closer together in age.


Then there are several women I know who have babies with the next sibling being above the age of eight. Though in these cases it’s because of circumstances beyond their control that they had children this far apart in age.

What do you think? What age gap would you or do you have between children?
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Comments
11 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by Little Angry Doll

November 8th 2006 05:11
I think this has a lot to do with the increasing age of first time mums. At 31, I was one of the two youngest mothers in my parent's group, and the last to have a second child. Our gap is just over 3 years.

We wanted our second child much, much sooner, but there was outside stress and we just gave up for a while.

We are looking at one more, but the clock is ticking.

Comment by Andrea

November 8th 2006 06:59
Hi Candice,

My daughter was four years, ten days old when my son was born. Didn't plan that one very well ... two birthdays in quick succession. I'm pregnant now and my son will be four years, two months old when this baby is born. Four years between babies seems to be our 'thing'. I must admit, though, if it had been solely my decision I would have probably cut the age difference to two or three years each time.

A.H.

Comment by Sandi

November 8th 2006 18:02
My children are 3 yrs. 11 months apart. This is the perfect age gap for us. I get stressed out easily, and I needed to be able to FOCUS on one baby, then toddler at a time. Having a wailing two year old, and wailing newborn would probably sent me to an early grave, in complete seriousness.

My daughter at 6 and my son at 2 1/2 are actually great together. They play with each other more than I expected. Plus, while my daughter is at school, I get the spend one on one time with my son, so I feel he isn't being screwed by the whole second child thing.

Comment by Candice

November 10th 2006 01:54
Little Angry Doll,

I think you're onto something there. The first mum to have her second child in our mums' group was 37 when she had her first. She said she didn't have time to wait long, especially as she already had a health scare for her first baby when her amnio was done.

Comment by Candice

November 10th 2006 01:58
Hi Andrea,
I know what you mean about timings with birthdays. Most of the birthdays for my family and my hubby's fall from October to December. With Christmas as well, we have to do some serious saving during the early part of the year (not that we managed that this year!). I'm just glad my daugther's birthday's in April. Some relief there at least! It's a shame we can't set a timer on babies' arrivals.

Comment by Candice

November 10th 2006 02:01
Hi Sandi,

I think I'd be the same as you. I don't know where I'd find the extra energy to put into another child ATM. It would also be nice to be able to focus on one completely - in an ideal world anyway!

It was nice to hear that your two children get along despite their age gap, or perhaps because of it? Thanks for your response.

Comment by Little Angry Doll

November 16th 2006 08:05
Hi Candice,

There were two mums in my mother's group who were over 38 and both of them had twins. Certainly IVF - though no one ever asked. Apparently (According to the SMH), I live in one of the Sydney's highest areas for older first time mothers.


Comment by Candice

November 17th 2006 01:59
Hi Little Angry Doll,

I thought it was interesting that you said at 31 you were one of the two youngest! It seemed like a large number of older mums in your group. I was 30 when I had my baby and fell in about the middle age range for our mums group. The youngest was 25 but most of us were over 30.

Comment by daily

December 23rd 2007 22:48
Hi I have 10 children

boy 17, girl,16, girl 12, boy 9, girl 8, boy 6, boy 5, girl 3,
boy 1, girl 0.

They all have someone to fight and play with.

From oldest to Youngest in order their names are:

Angus, Dinah, Emily, Anthony, Larah, Vinny, Christopher,
Olya, Sandro and Bianca.

They all get along brilliantly hardly ever fight and they always help with the baby.

Comment by daily

March 6th 2008 07:26
Good thing Angus is out of the house 1 less kid to deal
with. Advantges of a small gap is thEy will alays be not far apart in schooling years. They can play together too.

Advantages of big gap:not 2 babies in nappies and you can spend one on one time with the little one.Older one can help with baby.

Comment by mother

March 26th 2008 08:33
I have 11 borthers and sisters

brother-18 makes me pretty annoyed when
sister-18 closest sister are 18 and 3
brother-15
brother-13
me=girl-11
brother-8
brother-6
sister-3
sister-3
brother-1
sister-0
brother-0

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